At some point in my childhood I wondered into a forest, dense and dark. Inside it I felt ugly, uncomfortable and extremely alone. Later on I sought out guides that would lead me to beautiful clearings, optimistic open spaces that I had no idea existed. Today I find myself back in the thick of it and am overwhelmed by the fear, pain and sadness of this disorientating and thorny place within me. I am my own guide now and am uncertain that I can navigate my way back to that clearing.